When I went to graduate school one of my favorite things about Gerry Costa was that he gave everybody hugs. He’s a very kind man. His program really opened my worldview about early childhood development and how profound it is. Sometimes I feel like when I look at my own son and I see the beauty in his natural sense of play I owe that to Gerry Costa.
Also, when Teddy cried when he was first born “affect attunement” was my best friend. If I could get myself to calm down with deep breathing exercises it generally helped Teddy calm down. And when he cried I always got really upset internally. But the act of slowing down and focusing on my breath would generally calm me down and calm Teddy down as well. Check out this article. It has a lot of practical advice.
I also loved the idea that even if you can’t be present with your child 100% of the time (which is nearly impossible with how stressful it is to be a parent) – if you can even be present and in the moment with your child for even 30% of that time you’re doing great. I loved that.